I know that Mr. Darcy is a common topic. All girls are in love with him (for the most part), and I am no exception. But I would like to talk about WHY I love Mr. Darcy. And you may be surprised...
I had a friend of mine say something during one of our many, in depth discussions that made me think. She, in a fit of anguish (I think), said...
"Maybe there is no Mr. Darcy out there for me..."
WHAT?? That's a terrible thought! I hold true to the idea that there is a Mr. Darcy out there for ever girl (and probably an Elizabeth Bennett out there for the dudes, if that's what they'd want). And here's why I think this.
Girls tend to romanticize things. I know, shock...or not. But we take things that we like and make them better in our mind, and then spit them back out as reality. The problem with this is that this reality that we've spit back out doesn't go over well with anyone else...
But that's beside the point. Though it does play in to my main argument.
See, I'll show you. Think about Mr. Darcy. I don't care who you are. Think about what he says. How he acts. How he conducts himself. What do you notice?
He's perfect. He really is.
But he's not. The problem with this "Mr. Darcy" that we've created in our minds is that it's not actually the same Mr. Darcy that Jane Austen created. It's the romanticized version that woman have created in their minds and tried to push back out into reality.
Now, we're not entirely wrong. Mr. Darcy says the greatest things! Such as....
“In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.”
"Yes, but that was only when I first knew her, for it is many months since I have considered her as one of the handsomest women of my acquaintance.''
"My affections and wishes are unchanged; but one word from you will silence me on this subject for ever.”
Be still my heart! What a fantastic man! See? He is perfect. End of blog.
But....no.
There's the problem. We completely forget the first part of the book, the first part of the movie, the part of Mr. Darcy where he's a total and complete jerk. Remember when he said,
“She is tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt me."
“My good opinion once lost is lost forever.” (Arrogance much?)
"I have fought against my better judgment, my family's expectations, the inferiority of your birth by rank and circumstance."
Excuse me? He just basically said that Elizabeth wasn't pretty enough for him, that he's got great discernment, and that his "better judgement" is telling him that Elizabeth is inferior to himself. Right...what a charmer. Keep in mind, he completely insults her just moments before declaring his love. Way to win a girl over, Mr. Darcy. Then Elizabeth asks him if he dances and he says "not if I can help it". Let's also not forget about the fact that he destroyed Jane's relationship with Mr. Bingley and let Mr. Wickham run wild (without being severely beaten).
Mr. Darcy is a...well...a meanie head with self-centered tendencies.
Ah...but no! You can't say those things! He's Mr. Darcy! He's romantic and handsome and swoops girls off their feet!
Wrong. That's the Mr. Darcy at the end of the book. So when someone says there is no Mr. Darcy out there for them, then I just think that they're forgetting the part where Mr. Darcy made mistakes, messed up, said the wrong things, and then added insult to injury! What was he thinking??
Well, he's human (er...in a fictional character sort of way). If we (as in girls looking for Mr. Darcy or guys looking for an Elizabeth) really want to find this amazing, inspiring, take-our-breath away person, then we need to look for the whole person; flaws and all.
Part of the reason I love Mr. Darcy is that he isn't perfect, but he's perfect for Elizabeth. By the end of the story, he realizes his short-comings (So does Elizabeth, because both parties needed to admit they were wrong--but that's another blog entirely) and together they create the perfect pair. This is the perfection we see. Together, their flaws get washed out in them fitting together.
So, basically, this is a lot of rambling just to say that in order to find a Mr. Darcy, we have to be looking for the complete and real Mr. Darcy, insults and all.
“You have bewitched me, body and soul.”
