Sometimes, life pulls the rug out from under your feet, and
no matter how prepared you were or thought you were, you still fall on your
ass. I thought I had such a good thing, and it was; for a while. But then it
became something unbearable. Then I reached the point where I had to make the
decision of how much do I endure and when do I make for the hills? Cruelest of
all of life’s torments is uncertainty. Uncertainty about the future,
uncertainty about previous decisions, uncertain about actions, thoughts, words,
beliefs. Questions regarding people, promises, plans. Did I do right? Of
course, but what if…--Will it turn out fine? Absolutely, but what if…--There’s
no plan, obviously. There’s no promises, of course. But how much light must we
have gathered before we decide to plunge into the darkness, headfirst, heart
scared?
It’s not so bad being alone, save for those moments when you
realize it. Stop and think, or don’t, but soon enough life will hit you with
the truth and most of the time it’s ugly. Well, personally, I’ll be damned if I
let life catch me like that again. And yet, there’s no avoiding it.
The worst part of life is its uncertainty…..and its desire
to sneak up behind you and scare the shit out of you.
